Adventures in Babysitting

I have decided that this is going to have to be a weekly post. These kids that I am babysitting for are HILARIOUS and something is always happening that makes me think, "Of course." Yesterday was no different.

On a side note, Mike made me take down my babysitting flyer that was posted in the foyer and apparently not being read. Not one person called me. Mike asked me who I thought would be calling since we live in a condo with 50+ year olds. My logic was that these grandparents would pass on my number to their children. His logic is that if the kids are over at grandma's they do not need a babysitter. Today I ran into one of our neighbors who I love in the garage. He always asks how I am doing and remembers our names and what is going on. He then smirked and asked if that was my flyer on the bulletin board. I guess he agreed with Mike.

Back to yesterday. I am going to call these children Jack and Jane because it is easier. Remember, Jane just turned 3 and Jack is 9 months old. Jane is going to be the next Einstein. I can tell those wheels are always turning. She knows how I am going to react to her antics and has a plan on how to get out of any trouble. When I arrived, Jack was still in his crib from his nap (he was awake) and Jane was working on her potty training.

When I say "working" I mean she is wearing a pull up and does not like the potty. Her mom was physically picking her up and placing her on the toilet while she screamed when I came in. It was going to be a good day. The mom explained to me that Jane should not being doing "Number 2" in her pull-up. She was supposed to trained for this. Ok, good warning.

I got Jack out of bed and the mom left for a little free time. We all went outside to play on the jungle gym and let Jane ride her tricycle. I was appropriately dressed this time, with work out shorts and a Piggly Wiggly t-shirt. (Don't you just love the Piggly Wiggly? Someone the other day saw my shirt and said, "I have heard of this place!" It's real folks, and it's all you dreamed it would be.) We went inside to feed Jack his strained turkey and sweet potatoes, which really ended up all over me. The constant chatter with Jane let me know that everything was ok and I was able to keep an eye on what she was doing.

Then. Silence. "Jane??" I yelled? "NO!" She replied. This can't be good. She has run into the corner of the den and I could tell she was performing #2. "Did you go #2 Jane?" "NO! Leave me alone!" Oh good God. So I am running around to catch this child so she can A) be placed on the toilet, and B) not continue to sit in her own waste. Yes, Jack is still strapped into his high chair sitting sweetly. I got him down so he wouldn't fall over somehow while I wasn't there and let him crawl around. When I got Jane in the bathroom, somehow waste was suddenly EVERYWHERE. Holy crap. How do you clean this stuff up? So I am searching for Clorox as she is rubbing her clothes, fingers and feet in it. Then the baby is crawling towards the bathroom.

I hiked the baby into a football position and ran him back to the den. (Don't worry he also had a dirty diaper.) Then I cleaned up the bathroom and Jane. When we were done, I asked her to get a new pull-up. Oh she got one, but wouldn't let me help her put it on. I was done. I had already counted to 3 enough times - it was time for the dreaded time out. Except she didn't dread it. She sauntered over to the bench and started singing. Clearly this was not punishment. I let her get down a few minutes later and we got her pull up on. Got Jack cleaned up. PS - it is not easy to change a 9 month old's diaper because he can flip right over and crawl away. I realized half way through that I was grabbing his leg while he fought with all his might towards freedom. Oops.

Once that was done, it was dinner time for Jane. Mac & cheese and some fruit. I started to warm up the mac & cheese. "I DON'T WANT MAC & CHEESE!! I WANT CEREAL AND MARSHMALLOWS!!!" What the heck? Who doesn't like mac & cheese? So I am thinking, "what is it that she wants??" She wanted Lucky Charms. Her mother and I have had multiple conversations about how they eat this a lot because it is easy and they both like it. I am telling her no as I am rummaging desperately through the pantry for the Lucky Charms. It was against every bone in my body to give into a three year old, but I did it. Then she picked out all the marshmallows and ate only that. (I stole some of that mac & cheese!)

That was pretty much the extent of our adventures yesterday. I am always so tired when I come home, and was chugging caffeine pretty much the entire four hours. Bravo to you moms - I don't know how you do it. I told my mother today that I love watching these kids and have gotten to the point that this is just what comes with the territory...when the kids are as cute as this, and come to hug you when you are about to leave, you just can't stay mad.

Yes, I went to eat Mexican last night covered in strained turkey and sweet potatoes. I'm not sure the waiters even noticed.