Dumb

May I ask what you were doing this morning at 3:15? With my insomnia finally under control, I was fast asleep. Now, if you recall, Mike is working on these comp papers which are due in 10 days. I have gotten used to going to bed by myself because Mike has declared himself a night owl who does his best work from 3 pm to 3 am.

Because of this, I was not surprised when light from the bathroom streamed into my face, waking me up at 3:15.

Me: "Michael - what are you doing?"

Mike: "Don't worry babe. I'm just washing my face."

Me: "Ok, and then you are coming to bed?"

Mike: Silence

Me: "AND THEN YOU ARE COMING TO BED?"

No. Mike had an entirely different idea. Just as an FYI, his wallet disappeared sometime yesterday. Lost, stolen - who knows, but it is gone. We have searched the condo over and over again to no avail. Mike is convinced that the cleaning lady at his school stole the wallet. Apparently this lady has some questionable behavior (Mike claims he smells marijuana when they are both working late, and supposedly, the worker was given the password to all the computers in the department and logs on regularly.)

So instead of coming to bed, Mike informs me that he is going to confront the cleaning lady and get his wallet back. Now I am trying to shake the sleepy haze from my mind, but I am pretty sure this is the one of the dumbest ideas I have ever heard.

Me: "What if she has a gun?"

Mike: "The cleaning lady?"

Me: "I don't know...you know the school is not in the best area."

Mike: "Don't worry babe. It's fine. I've totally thought this out."

Great. He kept saying "I love you" because he knew how dumb of an idea I thought this was. So now I am wide awake thinking about the cleaning lady pulling out her gun or her posse of other cleaning ladies beating Mike up. On his way out the door, I told him, "this reminds me of a _______ idea," naming one of his college friends. This friend recently bought a turquoise golf cart and refused to walk down the aisle on the day of his wedding to anything other than the soundtrack to "Last of the Mohicans." My idea backfired and Mike seemed to think that my comparison made the idea even better.

Well, I fell back asleep and was awakened to Mike's snoring a few hours ago. I got up and let me tell you - there is no wallet to be found in this house. I am anxious for him to wake up just to see how this confrontation went!

Happy Birthday to Me!

So yesterday I turned the big 2-9. I was thrilled when Mike's brother in law text messaged me to remind me that I only had one year left until I was "officially old." Yikes!

I have to preface this post by saying that I absolutely love birthdays. I think it is the one time every year that you are able to do whatever you want and the excuse "But it's my birthday" always works. Yesterday was weird though. It was the first time that I have ever celebrated a birthday away from a large group, be it friends or family. I was trying to remember where I was last year because I had already moved to St. Louis when I turned 28. I realized that we took a trip down south, so I was able to celebrate with my family, friends, and then Mike's family. I had everything but a parade. This year, not so much. Mike and I went to a nice sushi dinner, but that was about it for the festivities. I got some great presents, but I think I always have such high expectations they can never be met. I am still waiting for Mike to wake me up doing cartwheels while he holds a cake and balloons.

I kept crying yesterday when people would call or email "Happy Birthday." And then my close friends from Birmingham sent me a package of cookies that sent me into hysterics. My mom said, "I think you are crying because you are so touched that everyone is thinking about you." Nope, I did not agree. I think I was just feeling sorry for myself. My mom also took the opportunity to remind me every time that I talked with her that 29 years before she was still in labor. I was a stubborn little baby and it took me awhile to decide to let the world take a look at me. Additionally, I was breach, and my mom made the decision to have a natural birth. Lots of things she could still be holding grudges about - good thing she let those slide!

Today I woke up and felt much better. Another great thing about birthdays is how many people you get to talk to and catch up with no matter how long it has been. I don't know why girls are so weird about birthdays, but I actually do keep track of who communicates in some way to wish me "Happy Birthday." A few years ago it would have made me upset if someone forgot my big day, but since then, I have missed some birthdays myself and realized these things happen. Other people's lives do not center around you, even on your day of birth.

So I started laughing when a friend of mine called twice today apologizing for not wishing me a happy birthday. The funny thing is, she called me yesterday and left a message just to catch up. I actually laughed when I heard the message because I thought, "She is going to feel so badly about this tomorrow." But what can you do? You can't call someone and say, "I'm so glad you called. You know it's my birthday, right?"

Yesterday I spoke with my Grandma (who I call Grandma - that is important). She asked if I had received her card (which I knew had a little spending money in it.) She started getting very nervous that it had not arrived, even though she had only mailed it two days prior. I made sure to check the mail today, and of course, there it was. The thing is, she had written, "Hope you have a wonderful day. Love, Nana." What in the world? I have never called her Nana. I showed Mike and informed him that I was pretty sure my grandma was losing it.

I called her tonight and asked her if she remembered how she signed the card. She said, "Oh Jenny, I knew you were going to get onto me for that!" Grandma has three surviving children, who each have a "set" of children. Each set of grandchildren call her by a different name. Our "regular" household calls her Grandma, while she is called Nana and Garbie by the other two. She explained that she was signing a card to my cousin, whose birthday is also in August, and just wasn't thinking. When I am a Grandma I am picking only one name and will not be answering to anything else. That is confusing!

So that is pretty much it. I went to get Mexican with a wonderful friend this evening and got some fun and very generous presents from her. I guess I am just growing up and birthdays aren't as fun as when you were five and didn't really have to plan anything or worry about money. The best part was knowing that I am loved and thought about by all the people that I talked to yesterday. Maybe mom was right.

I am exhausted and going to bed now, but I will have to write tomorrow about the restaurant interviews I attended today. Restauranteurs take their jobs very seriously! Good night!

Deep Thoughts and Potential Babysitting Job

When do you have your best thoughts? The kind where you invent something the world would be useless without, or you solve global warming? Some people do it in the shower. I like to do it while I am running. Yesterday I went for a run around 3 pm, which was just dumb because it was 90 degrees. (Yes, I know it is worse in Birmingham.) Regardless, as I was running I realized I wasn't thinking about anything. "Oh no," I thought, "has my life gotten so boring that I don't even have anything to think about while I am by myself?"

I get distracted easily and noticed a guy running ahead of me. I decided to race him (without his knowledge) and as soon as I picked up the pace, the thoughts began to flow. Apparently the speedier I am, the more problems I am able to solve and the more blog ideas I am able to come up with!

I started thinking about an "interview" (if you can even call it that) I attended this weekend in order for me to qualify to babysit these people's kids. They parents are friends with the kids I already babysit, and in most places, I would think that connection would be enough. I get it - you don't want to leave your kids with some stranger, but is it necessary that I come by on a Saturday afternoon so the parents can grill me and observe how I interact with their children? I was late because I got lost (of course) and started apologizing profusely. I just couldn't read this lady. I know she is a business women in event planning and apparently she does not put up with peons being late.

She took me into the den where her three year old daughter was coloring and her 6 month old daughter was just hanging out. They seem to be super nice kids and easy to get along with. The mom then went to get the dad and we all sat around the living room while everyone stared at me. AWKWARD. They began asking about my babysitting history (really?) and how I would handle different situations. I felt compelled to start babbling about all the interactions I have had with kids and almost wished I had brought my resume! I even threw out there that I took a Babysitting Class sponsored by the Red Cross when I was 11. What?? How long until they were done with me?

They asked how much I charged, and seemed to mull over this amount. In the end, it was agreed upon to be a reasonable price. Then they stared at me while I drew on a chalkboard with their three year old. I told my mother I would have preferred for them to get a nanny cam or something instead of watching me like I was going to run off with their child if they left us alone! Finally it was decided that I would be an appropriate person to babysit the children. At first this was supposed to be once a week for several hours, but apparently they found someone else to take that position. So I went on a faux interview just to keep these kids a few nights a month when the parents want to go out. I did not like this, but it will hopefully lead to a little extra money.

I went for a run today but was more focused on making myself finish than pondering the mysteries of life. I will try to think of something more exciting tomorrow! Have a great Tuesday!

It's Wedding Season!

Sorry it has been a little while since I wrote. We actually had things to do this weekend, which was a change, and always fun and exciting. Friday night we went to a wedding for one of Mike's cohorts. We had a good time, but it got me thinking about the differences that I have experienced so far between Southern and Northern weddings. When I say "Northern" I mean the 5 I recently have most recently attended; 2 in New Jersey, 2 in St. Louis and 1 in Baltimore. Here are my findings:

1. Band or D.J.? I had never really heard of having a D.J. at a wedding. The majority of the weddings I have been to have bands that sing the classics: "Brown Eyed Girl," "My Girl" and "Shout." Personally, I am not a fan of the chicken dance or the hokey pokey, which may be played by either. The good point of a D.J. is that they usually have more up to date music, but I'm also not sure how I feel to my Grandma dancing to "Back That Ass Up."

2. The Invitation: In the South, you can tell how expensive the invitations were based on how thick the paper is. These invites are very formal, usually with someone contributing their calligraphy as a gift, or having them printed in formal cursive. You can pay additional costs by throwing in a border or a monogram on the top. Additionally there are several sheets of tissue paper and envelopes inside of envelopes to notify you that this is a wedding invitation. Now not all, but some of the weddings that I have been to up here are much less formal in their invitations. They are more like a regular invitation to a engagement party or shower.

3. The Food: This is very important for your guests. I do have a preference to the choices I am going to offer, but I will not reveal it. However, I believe that it is important that you do have enough food to feed your guests, especially if you plan to serve them alcohol. (To be discussed in #4.) The buffet is very southern, with heavy hors d'oeuvres ranging from stuffed mushrooms, cheese plates and chicken fingers. Sometimes there are stations that you can make your way around. This is always fun. You hit the pasta station, then the carving station, etc. The grits station is my favorite - I am so having one of those. Stations are a good way to make sure that everyone is filled up - you just can't consume the champagne when you have only had a few pieces of cheese.

The other option is the sit down dinner. This seems to be more popular in the North, where you check on the return, pre-addressed, pre-stamped envelope: chicken, steak or fish. (By the way, it drives me crazy when people don't send those back. How hard is it to make a little "X" by your name and put it in the mail? Do you know how hard these brides have worked to make this easy on you? They just want an idea of how many people are coming so they can feed you!) But I digress. The only problem I have with the sit down dinner is that sometimes people are so busy, the mingling and dancing starts a little later.

Finally, at both the New Jersey weddings I attended, they had a cocktail hour, that led into the sit down dinner. This thing was amazing. Anything you could imagine at a southern buffet was at the cocktail hour, with a full bar. (Including my favorite, the pasta station.) Then, after an hour or so of visiting, everyone moves into the banquet hall where dinner is served. It is quite a feast and I would suggest fasting the entire day if you plan to attend one of these.

4. The Alcohol - This seems to be pretty universally agreed upon. Everyone seems to want alcohol at the wedding. Whether it is needed for some liquid courage to give a speech or ask the cute bridesmaid to dance, it is always welcomed. You have several options here. Full open bar, open bar with beer and wine, cash bar, or a simple champagne toast. I prefer the full open bar (of course - it is the most expensive) but it can also lead to trouble. The best bet may be to stick with the wine and beer.

5. The Parties - Although this is pre-wedding, this is a big deal in the South. You can have the Engagement party, the Stock the Bar party, the Around the House shower, the Tool and Gadget Party, The Couples Party, The Bridal Tea...the list goes on and on. I love this, but the idea either did not make it up here, or they nixed it. Although it is a lot of events, they are always fun and you generally get to see a different set of people at each event. (PS - You don't have to buy a present for each event either.)

That is pretty much all I can think of in terms of differences. The wedding we attended Friday night was a lot of fun. We were late, as usual, but I have gotten to the point where if it is not an event for my friend, I try not to make a fuss about it. If Mike feels comfortable sneaking into the last pew at his friend's wedding, I will go along with it. The only problem was, this wedding was in a banquet hall and there was no back entrance. Everyone sat at round tables while the ten minute ceremony was performed. Guess how late we were. Yes, ten minutes. We totally missed the ceremony. Then we had to walk through the front doors as the wedding party was taking pictures. I was horrified. "Hi guys! Congrats on that marriage. We are just here for the food and alcohol!"

It ended up being fine. They did have a D.J., and a disco ball at that. At some point I looked over and there was dry ice covering the dance floor. I think I lost the bride for a minute because the smoke was so thick, but hey. That was a new investment I had never thought of...always something new!

Why I Went to Law School

Don't worry, this will not read like an admissions letter. I was just trying to remind myself this afternoon what inspired me to take out a billion dollars in student loans and put myself through three years of hell. And tonight as I again cannot sleep, I remembered. (Now I want you to know that I have taken a Benadryl and an Ambien with no effect, so I am not promising stellar writing.)

Anyway, the reason I went to get a law degree is because of my kids. Are you asking, "Jenny, when in the world did you have kids?" I am talking about the foster kids that I worked with during my first job out of college. Things were so much easier then. I was a lot more confident when I went into interviews then because I was too naive to realize how competitive the market is/was. I actually asked my potential boss what DHR stood for (that is a staple in the social work world.) Regardless, after ensuring that I had "sowed my wild oats" (he really did ask me that) I was hired.

I was given a case load of 8 kids that ranged in ages from 4 to 17. Each of these kids were living with foster care families and had been diagnosed with some sort of DMV-IV criteria. (That is, they are considered to be suffering from a severe psychological condition. All my kids had issues, took medicine and really just needed to be loved.

One of my favorite stories that I remember is from the first time that I was on call. Yes, you read correctly, I was on call, with a beeper, and I do not have an MD. Most of the time, the calls were from parents who were just annoyed, but on my first weekend with the pager I got the mother of calls. I was told by the foster parents that they wanted to drop the kid off and were no longer willing to take him into their home. Now, when you are on call, you are responsible for every one's kids. This child was not mine, and I had no type of relationship with him. I asked to speak to him on the phone and asked him what was going on. Keep in mind this child is 8.

Child: "You're white, aren't you?"

Me: "Well, I don't think that is really the issue. Can you tell me why you are so angry?"

Child: "No you stupid cracker."

Me: "Ok, I think it is important that we try to resolve this situation because your foster parents are not happy and are thinking about taking you to the hospital."

Child: "Shut up you fat cow." Click. Phone call is over.

After speaking with my supervisor (who probably thought this was hilarious) I called the foster parents back and told them I would meet them at Children's Hospital. They did not want him riding with me because they were afraid the child would reach across the back of the seat and strangle me. Super.

When I walked into the emergency room, this child saw me and streaked across the waiting area to lock himself in the bathroom. Luckily for us, Children's Hospital must have come across this same type of behavior before, and does not allow the doors to lock from the inside. I walked into the bathroom and tried to talk with him. I still am not sure what set him off that day, but he had major issues that could be resolved with a lot of therapy for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, I don't think that is going to the path for him.

The nurse showed us the child's room for the moment and somehow it was determined that it was safe for me to be in there with him alone. I stopped him as he attempted to shove cotton balls down his throat, throw wooden tongue depressors around the room and then tell me that he was going to strangle himself with his sheet. At that point I called for the dr. to give him some sort of tranquilizer. As the child calmed down, but before he went to sleep, he told me thank you and I love you. I started crying because I was so overwhelmed with the situation, and of course the hospital social worker walked in right at that time. It was a little embarrassing.

That child is one of many that sealed my deal with law school. He was sent away to a residential facility and I have no idea where he has gone from there. Actually he may be almost 18 and will age of the system very soon. There are attorneys that represent these children, as well as their families. Albeit they are not well paid well, I feel that this is the most rewarding way that I will be able to use my degree. I have been searching for social work jobs and am hoping that something in that field will come my way.

Email, Texting and Faxing, Oh My!

My fight with insomnia continues. The good thing is, while I am laying in bed thinking of all the things that I can't fix, I also come up with some good blogging ideas. (Or so I think.) This one isn't really that funny, it is just what I think part of the problem is when it comes to my employment. (Which has now been 2 months.)

I am all over careerbuilder.com, yahoojobs.com, and other various websites. I also have a temp agency that specializes in legal work searching for something for me. However, the problem with this technology is, no one ever sees your face. I sit at the computer and hit "send" with my resume and cover letter over and over again. Who knows if someone is actually receiving these documents, and it is so easy, think about how many people are hitting "send" for the exact same jobs. I actually did receive a rejection letter from one of the companies, and it was a relief. At least they sat down and decided I wasn't a good fit for that career!

The other problem is that I don't really have any contacts here. Now, I made a decision to move to St. Louis and not to Birmingham, so I recognize that this is my own problem. However, it is nice when someone's daddy knows someone who could maybe introduce you to someone else. My three friends here just don't have the same contacts in comparison to the town where you grew up. At least someone could vouch for me in Birmingham that I am a hard worker and capable of being, for example, a secretary.

The final problem is, I now vacillate between what I want to do when I grow up. Mike thinks this is because my legal career has not taken off, but you should hear some of the ideas I have come up with. Ok, I will tell you. I thought about getting my teaching certificate, but I don't think I have the patience to run a classroom, and I wouldn't really be able to apply for a job until the next school year. (And we will have moved to another state by then.) Then I thought about being being a journalist. (I am not saying that I am a good enough writer to be a journalist, these are just things I think about. Remember, I wanted to go on American Idol.) Mike informed me that there are no journals in St. Louis, which I'm pretty sure is wrong, but that gave me an opportunity to say, "Another reason I hate this city." I even told Mike yesterday that I was going to have to work at McDonald's, and he really didn't seem too upset or concerned. All I could think about was hot grease flying into my face and either burning me or making me break out.

So, that is what I was pondering last night until 5 am. And then I keep thinking that some higher power is up there saying, "She really needed a taste of humble pie" and laughing. Well, I get it. I am humbled. Please throw me a bone!

Let's Go Red Sox, Let's Go!

So, I am back from Baltimore and once again adjusting to reality. It always feels like the problems you left behind smack you in the face as soon as you get back from vacation. It usually takes me a day or two to adjust.

Are you wondering why the Blackburn clan that lives in Birmingham, AL are huge Red Sox fans? Well, here is the romantic story. My mom and dad actually grew up in Arlington, VA and my grandparents grew up in MA. (Starting to see the connection?) When my grandfather was younger, he was DRAFTED to play for a minor league of the Red Sox. As the pay was not the same as it is now for sports players, my grandfather had to make a decision as to whether or not he would play baseball, or if he would marry my grandmother and go to work for the navy. Luckily for me, he chose the latter.

If that wasn't romantic enough, my grandparents only dated for two months before they got married. Their first date was a double blind date, and they were each set up with other people. Afterwards, my grandfather asked my grandma if she would be interested in going out with him. She said she wasn't sure because the other girl was her friend, but apparently the guilt was not too strong. As I said, they were married two months later! So that is how the Red Sox following seeped into our blood.

A few years ago, my dad decided that he would start traveling to see some of the games. We had done this as a family years before, but sometimes 5 is a crowd, and my mom is not the biggest sports fan in the world. So, dad started taking my middle sister with him, just because she knew player's names and stats and stuff. Well, my sisters and I have a weird thing where everything has to be fair between us. (I know, I am almost 30.) Regardless, my youngest sister and I threw a fit that we were not involved in these "father/daughter" weekends. Last year, my youngest sister went to a game or two, but I was still not able to go because I was studying for the stupid bar. If I could have seen into the future, I should have just met them somewhere!

This year, with nothing on the horizon, I was able to book a ticket to Baltimore and watch the Red Sox play the Orioles. Too bad the Orioles are no good, (and unpleasant fans as well) but we had a great time. We had wonderful seats and won both the games we attended. It was amazing to me how many Boston fans showed up (with their super strong accents!) Dad and I enjoyed a little too much beer Friday night, so we hung out Saturday, went for a run and went to dinner and the game at 7. As I said, the weekend flew by, but it was wonderful to see my dad and just get away.

Now I am back at home about to watch all the shows that I DVRd over the weekend. For those of you anxiously waiting, I finally finished the Twilight saga. So good!! Tomorrow the job hunt continues and maybe I will try to clean this place up a little! Mike's papers are due in 15 days, so say a little prayer/throw out a little thought for him! Thanks!