Happy Birthday Houston!!

I just couldn't let today pass without saying Happy Birthday to this very special boy. He turned three this year!!

This is Mike's sister's first baby - sweet thing. I think this is only a few days after he was born.

He was a big hit during our wedding preparations!

And was very supportive on the big day:

He is always good for a hug, or a little nap when you are tired.

And he is generally just the life of the party!!

We missed his birthday party today, but it was super hero themed, and from the pictures, it looks like everyone had a great time. It was hard for me to find a good shot of his face because he was so busy today, so this is what you get.

Happy Birthday Houston!!! You are such a big boy!!! We love you!

What Happened to Saturday?

So, I missed Saturday. I slept for 36 hours. I am like Rip Van Winkle. Part of it is that I have some kind of crud that my body was thankfully fighting off until I finished. The other part is just exhaustion. I vaguely remember Mike coming in and out of the room and asking if I was alive and ok, but besides that things are kind of a blur.

I am ready to be back to normal...hopefully it will just be a few more days. In the meantime, I have become hooked on the show Weeds, and am just eating to fill my time. Mike looked at me with a BOX of cupcakes in my lap today, watching television and said, "I think I'm ready for you to come back." Me too, babe, me too.

Recovery

I am having PTSD symptoms and I blame the Bar. I woke up soaked in sweat last night because I dreamed I was sitting with a bar examiner, watching her grade my essays. I kept watching as she continued to mark big red "X's" all over my papers. Then this morning at 5:30, my alarm went off. In my exhaustion last night, I forgot to disable it. I jumped out of bed (literally) and was so confused, trying to figure out where I was and what I was being tested on that day. I cannot tell you the relief I felt when I realized I was in my own bed.

We haven't unpacked because I pretty much came home, drank champagne, ate cupcakes and sushi (in that order) had some wine and went to bed. When I asked Mike today if he had any idea where my toothbrush was, he simply said that it was in his black bag. Wouldn't you know that comment somehow sent me into a fit of tears, heaving and sobbing on the couch. The reasoning was, he wouldn't help me find it?? Poor Mike. But I do think he knew I was a little crazy when he married me .

Finally, I just informed the pharmacist at the Wal-Greens that we will not be doing business with them anymore due to their lack of respect for their customers. That is a whole other story, but I have to find a new pharmacy. I think I should be fine in the next few days. I better. Mike's parents are coming on Tuesday and they cannot see me, or our house, in they condition that we are in!

Regardless, this thing is done. It was brutal. I only got 2 hours of sleep after the first day. I just couldn't sleep. I tried everything, but was still staring at the clock, wide awake, at 3 am. I got up that morning, threw up, and went and took the 6 hour, 200 question multiple choice test. (By the way - I can't remember if I wrote in that last post that someone also had a seizure during the first day and had to be taken out by the paramedics??) Anyway, I talked to my dad that afternoon who told me not sleeping was a horrible idea (in case anyone didn't know that.) Anyway. I went for a run and went to sleep. The funny thing is, the other kids taking the Bar were running around getting D-runk. It was like a college co-ed get away (one that I never partook in....)  I told you there was a complimentary happy hour - and they were taking full advantage. I really couldn't believe it, but somewhere in the back of my mind I was horribly thinking, "keep drinking! Maybe you will be too hungover to come tomorrow!" Mike actually called the front desk around midnight to complain that the kids in the pool were being really loud and keeping others awake. Sweet guy - I really think he was almost as stressed as I was. I don't think he slept much more than I did.

The last day was 12 essays - again, 6 hours. It is pretty much a time game, getting as much as you know written in some sort of a coherent manner. All I can say is, it's over. I don't know how I did, but I can honestly say I put up a good fight. The results come out early November. Three months. Aside from Wal-Greens, I haven't moved off the couch today. And I don't plan to.

All I want to do is take a minute and soak in just a few days of having nothing hanging over my head. No guilt if I decide I want to take a run, or God forbid, clean up around here. No guilt that I haven't put in the requisite amount of time at the library. No guilt in reading a book that doesn't contain law. I know that this is not life or death. I have done it before, and we all know, I have learned a lot in the past several years. I DO believe if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger. But I also believe I have that lesson down as an art form, and now I would just like to be a licensed attorney please. (It makes me nervous even writing that down.) I am a little bit superstitious.

I remember one of my friends getting her bar results back years ago, when I was still doing social work. She was going on a trip and sat down in her seat on the plane. She told me that when the person next to her asked her what she did for a living, she was proudly able to say, "I'm an attorney." I'm ready for that.

So thank you to EVERYONE who has thought about me for even a second over the last couple months. Thank you for the texts, the emails, the phone calls, the cards, the flowers, the plants, the fruit (it's gone and I got in this morning) and the free hotel room. I love each and every one of you very much. (I'm going to start crying again.) This has to stop.

Also, if I haven't responded to your sweet messages, please know I am getting there. I have been thinking of you. I am also aware that owe several of you wedding and baby presents. Those are also now in my line of sight. Enjoy your weekend!! PS- Happy Dance Day tomorrow!!

Done.

Short. Sweet. To the Point. Done.
Exhausted. Headed for sushi and wine. More to come.

One Day Down

I bet you didn't think you were going to hear from me this week. Well, I am sitting on the couch in our hotel room waiting on my cheeseburger to arrive. We had several options for delivery this evening - pizza, pasta, chinese or burgers. I figured since pizza was last night, and the others are sure to send me into a coma, the cheeseburger was the best option.

Michael and I left yesterday evening to travel the full 20 miles to Irving, TX. You may be wondering why I am staying at a hotel when I live only 20 miles away. First, I completely envisioned myself leaving late, getting stuck in traffic and missing the entire test. Second, I could not wait to get out of that house. The lady at the front desk seemed very overwhelmed. She gave me take out menus, quickly ran through the amenities and asked if I would prefer for my wake up call to be at 4:45 or 5. WHAT? Apparently that was the average rate going. I went for 5:30 (just to fit in.)

Mike thinks we are on vacation. He walked in the room, fully unpacked (we are here 3 nights) and is taking advantage of the free happy hour downstairs. He was also more than a little excited when we drove up and saw the pool. Last night was good - I wasn't too stressed because today was only half a day of testing. (Thank you Texas for having your own procedures, coinciding with the Federal Rules.) I walked in after the test in a great mood, laid down, and woke up a completely different person. Mike left shortly after to "run some errands."  :-) It has been good though - I was able to get some studying done without him pacing around the room or randomly interrupting me with comments about the news or whatever happens to be on t.v. As selfish as it sounds, (and I told him this) I really just need to him here to sleep.

Mike has been incredibly supportive through this entire process, but drew the line yesterday when we were packing and I suggested that we bring the plant and balloon my in-laws sent for good luck. (He also wouldn't bring me my coffee maker and coffee from home....isn't hotel coffee the worst??) He keeps informing me that we are not moving in, but it sure does feel like we have!

So. Today. I walked downstairs for breakfast and immediately began having flashbacks of law school. Here's the thing about law school - probably any school. We used to call it middle school with alcohol and sex. There are cliques, the cool kids, the crushes, the gossip. (Not so much the jocks.) The best part is, within this selective class, there is also a group that has somehow been placed in the class of nerds. And I laugh because let's be honest, everyone there is in some form or fashion, a nerd themselves. It's also funny, because there are an elite group deemed "the smart ones." These are the kids on law review, the ones with the best grades - the smart kids. I started thinking how ironic it is that we still have that hierarchy, while pretty much everyone there would be considered, "smart." (I'm not trying to pat myself on the back - I wasn't one of the smart kids. :-)

And so we all congregated together to begin this test that is supposed to define the rest of your life. A girl threw up during it. I felt horrible for her (but I didn't know until the end of the exam because I had my nerdy earplugs in!) The kid next to me told me. The thing about this test is that it is created to be as intimidating and anxiety producing as possible. We were required to bring our laptops into the testing area/corral in a 2.5 gallon ziploc bag. Why? I don't know because no one ever checked to see if we had. I think it is just to give you one more thing to worry about. You are given a number and sent to sit at a long table with people who are just as freaked out as you. The best part is the proctors. They make sure that you are unable to do anything that would make you comfortable, or the process less painful.

We had a break between 90 minutes sessions today. Several people got up to go to the restroom, which also contains a table with chilled water. You can see it. But you can't have it. You can't bring it to your desk. And during that 90 minute break, they wouldn't let anyone go to the bathroom! Several people made a run for it, but I watched a pregnant girl turned away because "this was not the time." They prefer for you to dash while the test is being timed, you have your earplugs in and are fumbling around trying to hand your license over the person guarding the bathroom. It is chaos.

So, if you are still reading, tomorrow is from 8-5. (They will be allowing lunch.) Sorry I wrote so much - this whole seclusion thing is tough!! And my burger is here!!

Top 10 Things NOT to do While You are Studying.

1. Don't decide this is the perfect time to clean the house. This is no time to be vacuuming baseboards.

2. Don't come home for ANYTHING, including food. You will inevitably be called to the couch where your nap will last much longer than the timer you set.

3.Do not accidentally leave your computer at home and discover your mistake once you get to the library. This will most likely result in #2.

4. Absolutely do not try to talk to people. You are in a reclusive state that not even you realize. No one understands what you are saying.

5. Avoid drinking multiple Red Bulls. This will definitely "give you wings" when all you need to be doing is concentrating. Potentially, you could arrive back at #1.

6.  Do not look at Facebook, blogs or again, talk to anyone (especially your family if they happen to be at the beach.) It will result in you feeling sorry for yourself, depression and a general questioning as to why you are studying.

7. Please do not leave the house without checking your face. Inevitably, there is some sort of food or drink plastered to it that no one is going to tell you about.

8. Similar to #7, do not take your stress out on your face. If you can't see the pimple without a magnifying mirror, the rest of the world (which you are avoiding anyway) probably can't either.

9. Do not feel badly about yourself because when you wake up, your hair automatically forms a ponytail before you brush it. This too shall pass.

10. DO attempt to avoid massive emotional breakdowns. They scare your husband, your cat, and only one of them has made a commitment to you for better of for worse.

Super Quick Update

As the bar is rapidly approaching, my domestic duties are waning. This is what our dining room table/my desk looks like: (don't worry - I know where everything is that I need.)

Mike said that it is embarassing to even post this picture, but this is our life. Mike has been helping out SO much - laundry, grilling and random acts of cleaning have made my life much easier.

However, this one just made me grab my camera. I ate some cookies as a snack.....apparently, I didn't get all the crumbs.

That is a mini dust buster - I didn't even know we owned it.
Hope everyone is having a great week!

A Break

I took a break today. And I'm not going to feel guilty about it. I went to get a hair cut, apologizing  profusely as soon as I walked it because I looked like Cousin It. I took a nap and then I went to dinner with a friend from college who I absolutely love. Three hours after we sat down for dinner, we both decided it was probably time to go home. I have been so secluded from the world that it was weird to see make up on my face and interesting to see whether or not I could still walk in heels. My go-to outfit for the past month or so has been jeans, a t-shirt and flips flops. Sometimes if I am feeling crazy, I will put on some mascara. Mike is a lucky man!

In 20 days this test will be over and done with and we can hopefully get back to whatever "normal" Mike and I know. I cannot wait. So....while there is nothing very exciting to report, I decided to give y'all a quick update on what is happening in our lives. I have been trying so hard to keep exercising while I am studying because of all those proven health reasons, relieving stress, sleeping better, blah blah blah. The problem is, it is so freaking hot here. It hits at least 100 degrees every single day. So, running is out unless I wake up at 3 am. I took a couple Zumba classes from this studio I found down the street. Have y'all done this? I loved it, but then I got annoyed that this one girl was better than me and I stopped going. I also realized this is part of the reason why I run...no none to compete with except myself :-)

The point of that paragraph was to explain why I went for a walk the other day. I figured it would do the trick, and I headed out the door with specific instructions to Mike. "Do not lock the door when you leave." You cannot even know how many times I have uttered those words with no problems. However, the one day that I sluggishly dragged myself home, dripping sweat and about to collapse, the door was locked. At first I thought this was a joke. I kept looking around for Mike's car thinking he was trying to trick me (sometimes he likes to do things like this.) The more I looked, the more I realized. This is not a joke. I looked at our cat, staring out at me, and started wondering if perhaps she is smarter than we give her credit for and would be able to get the Hide a Key that is sitting on our KITCHEN COUNTER. (Yes Pops, you were right.) No, I didn't have my phone.

Five houses later (can you believe that??) someone finally answered the door. I explained my predicament and watched her check my ring finger when I mentioned my husband had locked me out. She told me I could use her phone, and I started to follow her inside into the vixen air conditioning that was calling my name. She shut the door in my face and came back with her cell phone. And she never offered me any water!! (Am I being too sensitive here? I was really surprised!) I called Mike, who thankfully picked up a number he didn't know, and then handed her back a completely sweat soaked phone. The door shut and I went and sat on our little walk way up to our house until Mike pulled up. He managed to take a big swig of Mountain Dew before he got out of his car. I would never survive in the desert.

So that was fun. My middle sister leaves tomorrow for Israel and Slovakia. You might be wondering, as I did, why she chose these random places to visit and who in the world she was going with. This is how our phone conversation went this afternoon.

Me: Now, who are you meeting in Israel again?

Julia: Oh! My friend "S" lives there. Remember her?

Me: Not even a little bit. Is she from college? Or Iceland?

Julia: No! She's from when I was studying in Australia.

Me: Of course she is. Ok, then y'all are going to fly to Slovakia?

Julia: No! Jenny, remember, "B" lives in Slovakia.

Me: "B" from Iceland? The kid that came and stayed in Alabama?

Julia: Yes.

Me: Ok. Did you figure our something to get his parents for letting you stay with them?

Julia: Nah, I figured I would just pick up something at the airport.

Nothing about that conversation is normal. Julia is so funny. She was very shy growing up, and now she is off meeting friends in random countries that I am pretty sure I will never visit in my lifetime. It is pretty amazing. I hope I get something from the airport.

That's about it. Back to the grind tomorrow. I will try to check back in before the 26th - if you don't hear from me, send out some positive thoughts, a prayer, whatever you like. (I will not be accepting negative thoughts for the next 20 days.) Hope all is well!